East Bay View (a blog about several things)

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Thursday, May 25, 2006

Twelve more conservative songs

Further to the post below: here are a dozen songs that should've made the National Review's list.

The Rolling Stones, "Paint It, Black"
The sequel, "Varnish It, Mexican", was never released.

Aretha Franklin, "Respect"
All she wants is a little respect. No need for PC bull like equal pay, the right to choose or maternal leave.

Otis Redding, "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay"
He goes to that hotbed of debauchery, the Bay Area, and discovers he was better off in the South. Red states rule!

Procul Harum, "A Whiter Shade of Pale"
The title says it all.

The Beatles, "I Want to Hold Your Hand"
Hold hands, that's all. No suggestion of heavy petting or penetration or "sixty-nining" and how could you even think about such things?

Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five, "The Message"
A cautionary tale about what could happen to you if you don't get a job sweeping streets.

Bob Marley, "No Woman No Cry"
In which Bob discovers that if we had no women, there'd be no crying.

Sex Pistols, "Anarchy in the U.K."
A proto-Thatcherite ode to the free market.

Percy Sledge, "When a Man Loves a Woman"
Note: not "When a Man Loves a Man" or "When a Woman Loves a Woman" or "When a Man Loves a Donkey".

Michael Jackson, "Billie Jean"
A disturbing depiction of the delusions of a lesbian sportswoman.

Guns 'N' Roses, "Sweet Child o' Mine"
Even Axl Rose believes in traditional family values, as can be heard in this loving ode to his daughter.

John Lennon, "Imagine"
By asking us to imagine a world without fundamentalism, nationalism and profiteering, Lennon shocks us into realising how terrible an unconservative world would be.


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